When we found out we were expecting, Jason and I decided that I would continue working after taking some time off for maternity leave.
During the pregnancy, I tried to decide if I was okay with continuing to work. I love my job, and I love the feeling of working. It makes me feel productive. I felt like returning to work was definitely something I wanted to do.
Not so fast.....the day we brought Emee home from the hospital I was sitting on the couch holding her and just staring at her. Call it the postpartum hormones, call it me being a basketcase, but I started crying. Sitting there with her I realized that I simply didn't have it in me to leave her with someone else. Jason found me with tears in my eyes and a quivering lower lip. I tried my best to explain to him what I was feeling. It's more than just not trusting someone with her....I want to be there when she takes her first step, when she says her first word, and when she does all those cute little things she's bound to do. I want to teach her the alphabet, how to count, her colors, and how to read. I can't imagine leaving all these things up to someone else. I suddenly felt very compelled to accept this new job with zealous ambition and determination.
For me, it was as clear as could be. This is where I needed to be. For the first time, this is where I wanted to be. I never thought I'd be one of those women who wanted nothing more than to take care of their children and their homes.
It's definitely going to be a struggle financially. Until Jason finishes school, we'll manage to scrape by....somehow. It will be difficult but I can tell already it will be worth it.
I'm sad to quit my job because I feel like I'm giving up a part of myself. I'm sure I'll still be obsessed with teeth, and a person's smile is still the very first thing I'll notice. Eventually I hope to go back to the dental office and that part of my life. But for now I'm excited for this new journey I'm about to embark on.
Wish us luck!
7 comments:
Congrats to you! Aidan is 14 months old and in three weeks I get to be a SAHM. I am both scared and excited...let me know if you need anything. And congrats again
I had some of the same thoughts and feelings. Being a "SAHM" is the best!
SAHM is the hardest and best job ever! Leaving working was hard for me too. I still sometimes miss that adult interaction. But when your baby smiles at you, it's all worth it!!!
Jill, I hear you loud and clear. One thing that has helped us financially is couponing, if you ever want to learn how to do it, I'll teach you. Seriously, I've been able to build our food storage while at the same time save over $2000 this year alone on groceries and other necessities.
She is sooooo adorable. We can't wait to see her in person!
Congrats on your decision! You will not regret it- Being home with my kids has been the best decision I have ever made! Good luck.
Best decision you've ever made. Not the easiest, but the best to the soul. Make cheap homemade food, and love no-cost stuff. The sunset's gorgeous every night--free for us all.
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